Hey all, sorry I haven't updated in the past couple months. My job has been keeping me busy, taking me to such exotic locations as Chicago—where the beer flows like water and fanny-packs are the daily uniform. Now I'm back home from my travels, getting ready to shoot some new commercials for Foster's Beer in a few weeks. I think it's Australian for beer, or something, so keep an eye peeled for those on TV next month.

I've also started two new blogs: "How The F Did That Get There?" and "Handsome Mannequin."

I started How The F with a few of my friends out in Chicago. The idea is that anytime you see a random item on the side of the road (one sneaker, underwear, three tube socks) you always wonder how it got there and you know it has to have a story behind it. We're taking pictures of any random discarded items we see and then leaving it up to everyone else to tell the story of How The F it got there (in the comments section). Stop by and leave your story.

My second new blog, Handsome Mannequin, is a pretty simple one. I see a handsome mannequin, I take a picture of it and I post it on the blog for everyone to enjoy. That's about it. So check those out if you're bored. Hope all is well out there, I'm expecting welcome back gifts to start pouring in any day now.

This is the first in a comic series I'm working on with the nut-tastic (that sounded perverse) illustrator Tamara Starr. The series is titled "Malefactor."

Malefactor \ˈma-lə-fak-tər\
1: One who commits an offense against the law ; especially : felon.
2: One who does ill toward another.

All work by "The Acorn King" is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

I’ve lived on the border of Bed-Stuy and Clinton Hill Brooklyn for around four years now, and every few months I would fire a few shots into the night sky from my apartment window to keep my rent stabilized. Rent control mutha suckas! But despite my best efforts, my neighborhood has officially become trendy and with trend comes increased rent. Yea!

Is your "up and coming" neighborhood coming up?
Recognize the signs and act before it’s too late.

*The appearance of a thrift shop
*The disappearance of a bulletproof bodega
*A record store (that actually sells records)
*Several Bohemian bagel/coffee shops
*Asian infiltration
*White people with dreadlocks
*A lounge
*People walking with instrument cases
*Loud band practices
*Outdoor cafes
*New construction of luxury condos
*Art galleries
*Increase in actually good street graffiti
*Babies
*Widespread gentrification
*An explosion of ethnic restaurants
*Pups
*More lights
*More stoplights
*Increased police patrol
*Open mic nights

TBA
*A hookah bar
*Tattoo parlor
*Influx of bars serving PBR cans
*An American Apparel Store

Seriously –
Does anyone know why every tree in the city (especially in the outer boroughs) are covered with audio tape?
If you haven’t noticed this phenomenon, just look up in a tree.

Did everyone in the early 90’s go “I’ve got a CD player now – Screw this cassette bullshit!”
then proceeded to strip the tape from their Jodeci ‘Cassingles’ streaming them across Brooklyn tree tops.

I still happen to cherish my MTV Unplugged version of Jodeci’s Cassingle ‘Lately’...almost as much as I cherish you mom. Snap.

Hey people who wear sunglasses inside...
You look fucking stupid!!!



*Unless you're Fab 5 Freddy. Freddy is always fresh.