4 SALE: BARELY-USED LATE NIGHT TALK SHOW – MAKE ME AN OFFER!!!  

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Hmm, yeah..economically speaking, at $45 mil methinks Conan made out alright..however it is pretty funny that he's making light of this whole late night fiasco.

Dollars to doughnuts though (or in this case, bucks to bacon beards), I doubt Conan would need, nor want, a beard made of bacon. Even as awesome as it is.

But as a friendly gesture I will gladly take the bacon beard off your hands.
I have the following for trade:
1) a three-day old, partially eaten Subway sandwich (I think it was tuna salad, hard to tell now)
2) a broken wheel barrow (it is missing the wheel assembly and one handle)
3) a 14-inch pencil--the "Jumbo Jotter" (think of all the writing you can do with that!)
4) an epileptic ferret (great conversation starter and ice breaker at parties or AA meetings)
5) Rod Stewart's cd box set, 'Soulbook' (it's not Barry Manilow, but a second best)

Shipping and handling would be your responsibility. Let's do business!

=D